What is it?

Click to view

Funny Paperz

Tattoo of the Century; Pt. 2

Here's the rough sketch

He came in and checked it today and guess what...

HE LOVED IT.

This is the paper version, stay tuned for the cleaned up version committed to flesh!

So ridiculous.

Haven't been on the computer in 4 days.

No facebook (only mobile)

No Alex Jones

No AlJazeera

No 4 eye union

Too busy unfortunately.

Tattoo of the Century; Pt. 1

Today a black guy wearing a dew rag walks into the shop

(don't give me that look, I'm trying to "paint" the setting for you...)

Anyway, he tells me that he wants to start a half-sleeve sized tattoo.

When I ask him what he wants to do, he pulls out this piece of paper and tells me how he NEEDS each of these elements incorporated into this single tattoo.

Serious.

Let me translate this list for you:

-9 tear drops

-rays of light

-the Twin Towers

-Obama

-Hurricane Katrina

-The number "13" between a set of angel wings

-Arm & Hammer baking soda logo

-An oil can

-A flaming bush

-Prison bars

-an 8-ball

P.S. - Did anyone notice the porn site URL at the bottom of the paper?

..............

....WHAT KIND OF FUCKING TATTOO COULD POSSIBLY BRING ALL OF THESE SURPRISINGLY IRRELEVANT INDIVIDUAL IDEAS TOGETHER!?

I honestly don't know. He put down a deposit and will be at the shop at the end of the week to check the drawing.

I have to put something together. Stay tuned for Pt. 2 to see what nonsense I come up with.

(And here I am getting rock hard at the idea of someone wanting to get a fucking panther head)

Secret paintings...EXPOSED!

You know what's funny?

I do A LOT of paintings.

A LOT of paintings with secret symbols and subliminal messages hidden all over the place.

...and no one has ever caught it.

How do I do it?

I use a single nostril hair split in half as my brush.

And a microscope.

Here's a new one I'm working on right now. Sorry to spoil the secret.

150x zoom.

That ain't easy.

All I know..

Is chinese food:

King Chef - (Greentown)

An earnest looking C-Purv waiting on his Pu Pu Plater.

Bamboo House - (Chesterfield)

 5 Dollar Buffet Mayne

And to wash it all down we got some Neo-Hippie Milk (NHM):